Week 25 report

I'm accepting that I'm not going to get a video made this week, so I thought I would at least come report.

At my Sunday weigh-in, I weighed the exact same weight as last week, to the 10th of a pound.  It's the exact same weight I weighed 4 weeks ago.  I didn't have to give any foot rubs as I stuck to not eating treats and not eating at night. 😄👍 I felt good about my food choices, although I know they were nowhere near as stellar as they could be.  I did feel like I was eating too much, so I wasn't surprised I didn't lose weight.  The funny thing is, I didn't really mind.

I'm in this weird, yet really nice, acceptance phase of my body right now.  As long as I eat right (according to my standards, not others), I feel really great, regardless of what the scale says.  I've had this epiphany of sorts that people struggle with body image and body acceptance no matter how small they get.  There is always something to pick at, and reaching a healthy weight is not the end of the destination.  It's just one step in the life-long journey to stay healthy.  I guess this has made me feel in less of a hurry to "arrive" at that destination and more interested in enjoying the journey. It's going to be a long one! 😊.

I obviously need to eat less calories to continue to lose weight.  I could do this the old-fashioned way of counting calories, weighing my food, tracking, etc.   Or I could focus on eating more low-calorie, nutrient-dense food (greens, beans, potatoes) and really work on eliminating the calorie dense foods (flour products, oils, vegan meat substitutes). Or I could keep eating the way I am and just try to eat a little less at each meal.  There are a lot of things I could do....but right now....I'm kind of content to just keep doing what I'm doing.  I'm working hard to get the family to eat more plant-based, but part of that is cooking more calorie-dense meals that will appeal to them.  If I eliminated flour, oil, salt, and snacking, I would definitely drop weight, but I may end up resenting the journey and bailing out of the path.  Part of me still thinks I can make my way towards that healthy weight without completely eliminating those things...so that's where I'm at right now.  I'm going to keep exercising, keep eating healthy foods, and keep trying to eat more nutrient-dense, low-calorie foods.  Every time I make up my mind to do more than that, I end up bingeing to some extent.  I feel like I have a million other things to focus on and attend to right now (exaggerating, I know).  I'm making my physical health a priority, more so than ever before, but I can't let it become the all-consuming purpose of my life.  I've made some pretty drastic changes (no meat, no treats, no night snacking, very little dairy, big increase in fresh produce, daily exercise), and today, I'm content to just maintain those changes.  Maybe next week I'll be ready to step it up a little so I can see the scale go down again. 😊. If not, I'm learning to love myself where I am.  Yes...even at 195.4 pounds!

Week 24 Report

This past week felt like re-take after re-take in the "film" I'm trying to make of living healthfully.  I never did quite get the scene right.  I gained exactly one pound.  I weigh the exact same weight I did four weeks ago.  I guess the only silver lining in that cloud is that I don't weigh more than I did four weeks ago.  That's about all I can find to celebrate.  Also...I haven't given up yet.  I still made a video. I'm still trying.

Here are a few photos of the healthy stuff I cooked and ate:

White bean green enchiladas.  I would post the recipe, but I didn't love them.

Sweet potato, kale, vegan sausage bowl

Indian Vegetable Curry

Curry on rice with tofu ranch dressing

Meals prepared for lunches for hubby and me.

All of the following was in my house one night and I did NOT eat any of it!  A friend dropped off the pie when I wasn't home and my hubby brought in the rest for a party, along with chips, soda, and ice cream!  I ate too much this week, but at least I didn't eat all of these sweet things...even though I really wanted to!

Blueberry Lemon Pie, dropped off warm and fresh on my counter while I was out grocery shopping!

Large chocolate cake from Costco

Fresh-baked, warm chocoloate chip cookies my hubby made.  These were the hardest to resist!

Week 23 Report

I've finally accepted that I'm not going to get a video made this week, too many things going on.  Now that my kids are out of school, it's going to be harder to get videos made because I don't like to do it when people are around.  There may be more written reports for awhile, but I won't abandon videos entirely.

I have a lot to say, but I need to be quick since I have an appointment this morning and I've got to get on the treadmill before then.  I keep waiting for the week to pass by where I can come on here and say, "I was awesome!  I totally rocked it!"  I have had those weeks, but it feels like it has been a long time since I have had them.  I just feel like it's all I can do right now to tread water.  I'm not moving forward, but I'm not sinking.  I do kind of feel like I'm barely hanging on at times.  Some days it's all I can do to just not eat sugar or meat.  It seems to depend on how different my schedule is from the norm, how much I'm running around, and whether or not unexpected things come up and whether or not I've planned my meals ahead of time.  Analyzing all of this constantly has helped me understand why I've never successfully lost weight and kept it off before.  It ain't easy!  It takes continual effort, diligence, commitment, recommitment, and so forth.  I have to keep reminding myself that all of this effort is worth it!

I lost one pound exactly last week.  I was hoping to blast off 3 pounds or more by being extra diligent, but it didn't happen.  It's okay.  One pound down is still one pound down. I was on the go a bunch and ate out a bunch.  I ate really great the first part of the week and not so great the second.  When all was said and done, I was happy to lose one pound.

That's all for now.  Gotta go exercise before the kids wake up!

Week 22 Report

I went on an awesome little trip with my hubby last weekend.  We visited Monticello, we visited a grist mill, we went on a beautiful, yet challenging, hike at Crabtree Falls.  My fitbit clocked 108 flights of stairs climbed that day!

There were lots of great things about my weekend...and some not so great.  I ate sugar again.  The ever popular "I'm on vacation so I deserve a treat" voice won again.  I made a conscious choice to eat the sugar, thinking I would get right back on when I got home, but it didn't work out that way.  I had another day of treat-eating to go before I could get back on track.  I also had to read almost an entire health book to make me WANT to get back on track!  It was only two days, but the mind does funny things when I go off my plan.  It doesn't take long before I find myself wondering if the plan is really that important.  I thought about all the out-of-town events I have coming up where I'll need to make exceptions to my diet or else be a really giant pain to the guests I am staying with, and I just felt my resolve to live this lifestyle weaken considerably.  I didn't gain weight, but I felt myself caring less about the whole effort.  My mind was starting to go the direction of "Eat, drink, and be merry."  It was crazy!

Fortunately, I had better voices going on in my head as well.  Underneath the "Eat, drink, and be merry" fog, I knew I wanted more than that.  I knew I had this blog and friends to hold me accountable.  I made myself read a health book, not wanting to do it, but knowing it would motivate me and it totally did.  I had that inner resolve that I would not give up on this journey, no matter how many setbacks I hit along the way and no matter how long it takes me to reach my destination.  As I was processing all of this, I came across this quote:

"It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get back up." --Vince Lombardi

Then I got an e-mail from Brian Johnson titled "Never Waste a Mis-take.  It's all awesome data!"  I talk about this in my video more.  It is an awesome way of approaching our mistakes.  This was Brian's message:

Have you ever made a mistake?

(Hah.)

Right.

(I’ve made a mistake or 3 million as well.)

Here’s the deal: When we approach it with the right mindset (that would be a growth, experimental mindset), we come to realize that those mistakes are P R E C I O U S.

The data we get on what DOESN’T WORK is priceless.

Therefore, never (!) beat yourself up about a mis-take.

Simply remind yourself that we either win or we learn and that no movie was ever shot from start to finish without a ton of re-takes. Then say to yourself “Needs work!” as you rewind your game film, see yourself executing the oops scene perfectly and then get back at it.

Repeat.

Forever.

So…

Practical Reflection Time:

What was your last mistake?

What did you learn?

Run it through our little Mis-take process above and +1 it.

I actually took the time to write down my past few mistakes and what I learned from them.  It was a very revelatory process and I highly recommend it.  I'm starting to think this is THE KEY to success, at any endeavor.  My natural inclination is to think success (particularly weight loss) is all about being perfect and doing everything right the first time. I want that to be my experience.  I wish it came that easy for me!  Really though, the key is getting back up, trying again, learning from my mistakes, and moving forward after I make them.  I think that is going to make all the difference in this journey.  I will do as many retakes as I need to finally get the scene right!  I will reach my destination!